chatter.chaboud.com

8/11/2006

What an unfortunate name…

Filed under: — site admin @ 2:13 am

Doctors in Chenmai, India, suspect that the recent birth of a one-eyed child may be the result of Cyclopamine use as an anti-cancer medication.

1/28/2005

The plate mail gauntlet industry’s revival…

Filed under: — site admin @ 1:52 pm

Hot on the heels of last-month’s report of Servette midfielder Paulo Diogo’s ring-finger severing goal celebration (which somehow managed to net him a yellow card) comes the settlement of a case in which Shineece Cudjoe’s infant fingers were severed by the lid of an incubator mistakenly closed on her hand at the Royal London Hospital. Amazingly, Shineece’s mother, Doris Obeng, settled for a scant £30,000, which, for a life-altering case of gross malpractice, seems like a deal…

1/21/2005

Roll up your sleeves and sue…

Filed under: — site admin @ 5:10 pm

Nothing is particularly exceptional about the story of Ron, Fazila, and Antonia Verni of Newark, New Jersey, who’s car was struck by a truck driven by the then absurdly intoxicated Daniel Lanzaro, a man having recently attended a New York Giant’s football game, paralyzing the then two-year-old Antonia. Of only minor note is the sum awarded to the family, a lottery-win-worthy $135 million.

What is exceptional about the story of the Vernis is that the jury ordered that $105 million be paid, not by Lanzaro, who was ordered to pay $30 million, not by the beer vendor, who exceeded by four beers company policy limiting sales to two beers to one person at any given time for a paltry $10 tip, but by Aramark, for fostering an atmosphere in which intoxicated patrons were served.

I think I left my personal responsibility in my other pants…

8/26/2003

It’s either sickeningly sad or sadly sickening…

Filed under: — site admin @ 7:11 pm

In Phoenix, Arizona, Louis and Estelvina Rodriguez were arrested for keeping their 5-year-old twin sons locked in cages filled with roaches, feces, and urine. More haunting than the idea that these children suffered under terrible living conditions is the fact that this stemmed, apparently, from their father’s condition at 69 years of age. Simple arithmetic leads to the image of a 64-year-old man in the throes of an act so egregious that it warrants a ban in the form of a constitutional amendment. One has to wonder at the likelihood that the Rodriguez children will not suffer from any long-lasting ill-effects of their years of imprisonment, or the painful teenage realization that their father was over 60 when they were conceived.

Similarly miniscule is the probability that none of the children of Heol Tregonning, Llanelli, South Wales will require counseling for Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder after watching a man bite the head off of a kitten. Only slightly better are the chances that they may benefit from sadomasochism hypnotherapy, pioneered by Ai Aoyama, a former club dominatrix turned mental health counselor.

Sadomasochistic hypnotherapy’s existence may owe a great deal to the failure of relatively simple forms of classic therapy. Pouch Cove, Newfoundland organizers did their best to gather 4,703 people in an effort to break the Guinness world record for the largest group hug, but their best was not enough. Instead, they amassed 69 people. Congratulations…

7/22/2003

Wow…

Filed under: — site admin @ 1:57 pm

A man near Agra, India nearly lost his head when iron rods and pipes pierced his neck, leaving only his spinal cord holding his head to his body. Thinking quickly, he straightened his head, tied a cloth around his neck to hold his head on, and drove his truck to the nearest medical center (a nursing home, 30km away!), where doctors re-attached his head. His co-worker, who had been sitting in the truck beside him, passed out in response to the gruesome scene, which left onlookers too stunned to act. If the New India Press story takes too long to load, click on the “Continue reading..” link for a local copy.
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