These people obviously have too much time on their hands. Some take Rock, Paper, Scissors way too seriously, some compete in jump-rope tournaments, and others hold air-guitar world championships. Most of the nationally-competing air-guitarists are from New Zealand, Finland, Australia, Holland, Belgium, Norway, and the United States, all of which make sense. Make sure to watch the 2003 winner, C-Diddy.
Doing their best to populate local emergency rooms, United Blood Services of Durango, Colorado and four area breweries banded together to trade a pint of beer for a pint of blood in a recent blood drive. One can only wonder what happened to 120-pound donors who attempted to drive home.
Not nearly as harmful but certainly as ill-conceived are the bouts of state-sponsored harassment taking place on busses in Santiago, Chile. The local Education Ministry has begun paying art students to provide short lectures on art to captive audiences on busses city-wide. Chilean officials could have something to offer school officials in Nairobi, Kenya who’s ban on video shows and discos at an all-boys school resulted in wide-spread student looting, rioting, and burning. Forced exposure to Spencer Tunick’s recent New York art exhibit, featuring 450 naked women, might have quelled the students’ splenetic rampage…
While students and faculty members at Swarthmore university are busy fighting to keep Diebold Elections Systems from rigging elections by providing internal email messages implicating several felonious violations of law for download, University of Victoria students have begun taking classes in bondage. It causes one to wonder how labs would differ from discussions.
Given that Germany’s newest craze, porno karaoke, will likely prove too subtle for bondage-class students, a blurring of the boundary between education and public fornication should be expected in the near future.
Eric Alvarez met with what seems like the obvious consequence of surfing on New York’s C train when he hit his head on a girder, a collision that left him on the tracks to be struck by another train.
An Austrian BASE jumper evaded the similarly obvious terminal outcome of his activities when his parachute failed to open properly after his jump from the 35th floor of a building in Berlin, Germany. As he fell to what should have been his end, his parachute caught on a crane eleven stories up.
In a rare occurance of justice within the justice system, Kevin Kinder found himself in a holding cell with a 22-year-old man whom he had molested eleven years before. The man, upon realizing the beauty of his situation, wasted no time in making up for Kinder’s transgressions. To that end, Kinder was beaten and knocked unconcious.
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